gender

My First Fuck

I don’t have any secrets, at least not my own. I prefer to live my life as an open book, with relatively few exceptions (looking at you, current employer). I do, however, consider myself a collector of the secrets of others, which is especially fun when I can partake in those secrets.

Most of my friends don’t know what I’m about to share with the world. Tonight’s juice is about the first time I had penetrative sex. It was during my college years with a trusted partner, and despite the college norm, my first time was actually anal sex, not vaginal. If you want to get technical, the more common name for what I transacted is pegging. (more…)

How a Cartoon Show Taught Me That I’m Perverted

Hey! / What a wonderful kind of day / where you learn to work and play / and get along with each other / Hey!

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Ever see Arthur as a child? I grew up watching that show every day after school. Even as an adult, when I stumble upon reruns as I’m channel surfing, I’ll watch an episode or two (or ten) for old times’ sake.

I have a distinctive memory of one episode that forever changed my life. When one of Arthur’s friends rips his pants in front of their third grade class, Arthur begins have nightmares that he will be humiliated by having his underwear exposed at school, too.

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Boyfriends Who Look Like Girlfriends: Crossdressing, A Double Standard

A couple years ago, I read a book called My Husband Betty, about Helen Boyd learning to cope with her husband’s cross dressing. Back then, I knew very little about cross dressing, but my knowledge repertoire rapidly expanded as I delved headfirst into this page turner. Betty quickly became a favorite guilty pleasure the day I checked her out from my university’s library.

The book began with a description portraying the double standard** of how it’s considered sexy when a woman wears men’s clothes, but not vice versa. If a woman rolls around on a bed wearing nothing but her male lover’s button-down shirt, it sounds like the description of a perfume ad. We say she’s sexy, she’s sensual, and she’s acting out of love. In contrast, if a man did the same thing for the same reasons, wearing nothing but his female lover’s satin dress slip, it would be for grins. People would laugh at him, they’d ridicule him, and they might even threaten him with physical violence.

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That Time I Sold My Shoes To Creepy Old Men (Foot Fetishism, Part 2)

On a lark, I listed some dirty, old shoes on eBay last summer. Years ago, my collection of shoes hit the 130 mark, and I just don’t have the room (or energy) to love and appreciate most of them anymore. I had heard that it’s possible to make hundreds of bucks on eBay selling used shoes to fetishists, so I figured, hey, why not give it a whirl. I artfully crafted a few listings and crossed my fingers. I mean, I love shoes, shoe fetishists love shoes… boom, instant camaraderie and cash. After all, we’d be looking out for each others’ best interests in a sorta-kinda-almost perverted mutualism, right?

Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.  (more…)

Healthy Masculinity

Mysterious strangers of Tumblr, you’ve done it again. Say HELLO to my new favorite Tumblr tag: #healthymasculinity. Join the movement at http://healthymasculinity.tumblr.com! (more…)

I Love My Gays, Just Not When I Can See Them

My alma mater has a week every April set aside to celebrate our LGBTQ students and raise awareness to the fact that, yes, they do exist. The event is widely celebrated, particularly for the day when hundreds of free “Gay? Fine by Me.” shirts are given out. I had to wait two years to get my hands on one; that’s how high the demand is. They’re a treasured commodity. After all, what’s college without a few politically active t-shirts? (more…)

Foot Fetishism: Friend or Toe? (Part 1)

Believe it or not, foot fetishism is the most common of all fetishes.

As with other fetishes, most of its population is male — like, upwards of 90% — but a small percentage of foot fetishists do identify as female.

Foot steppingIt is also common for foot fetishists to have other fetishes (for objects like shoes, toenail polish, hosiery, etc.) or sexual preferences (for behaviors like submission, domination, crossdressing, etc.) alongside their interests in feet. (more…)

My Favorite Time of the Month. Period.

Ever since my tweenage years, I’ve been thrilled to get my period each month. I waited for what felt like ages for my ticket into the elusive cult of womanhood* and listened jealously to my post-menarche friends lamenting over their monthly blues. When it finally showed up unannounced one afternoon, I was ecstatic. (more…)